by leaps and bounds

Sitting here yesterday the message, “Change your narrative” came to me out of nowhere. To be honest I can’t really say it came as a surprise because if I was to be honest, I’d admit that it is one that I truly needed to hear. Why?

Well, I’m not a very confident person and I battle insecurities that I have allowed to rule over my life for far too long. Sadly, even though I am getting stronger daily in my walk with Jesus, there are things that I still recoil from due to the years of being told I wasn’t good enough, or that I’d never amount to much. Especially the digs that were put in over my lifetime pertaining to my writing. Every time I send one of my blogs off to Hannah I sit and fret and just wait for the email that I’m absolutely sure is to follow saying that they made a mistake in asking me to write for them. 

I think so many of us get so caught up in the narrative that we have written for ourselves, or that we’ve allowed others to contribute too, that we forget that we, along with God, have the ability to change that narrative at any given time. Yes, He is the Author of our life, but it’s our own free will that often leads us down the paths that lead us astray thus to a narrative that perhaps we aren’t all too happy with. We see the course it is taking and the way that we are being portrayed to the world and it makes us unhappy. Not just with ourselves but with life in general. And how many times have we sat and found ourselves crying out to Him begging for things to be different, all the while not realizing that we truly did have the power to make it so? 

After receiving that message yesterday, I prayed for clarification, and He showed me Colossians and 1 Corinthians. So, I spent some time in them and for the sake of the length of this I’ll just list them here for reference, but it was these verses that called out to me: Colossians 2.6-10, 3.1-5, 3.12, Corinthians 1.5, 3.16, 15.33-34, 15.58. 

So how is it through these passages that I am inspired to change my own narrative? 

Where I once thought I was weak and had nothing to be thankful for, I know that I am strong because of my faith in Him and that I have an abundance to be thankful for because He has been so good to me. (Colossians 2:6-7)

The very generational curses that have long ruled my life no longer have their hold on me. My eyes are focused on Christ only as He has freed me of the need to hold onto things that no longer served me. (Colossians 2:8) 

For the first time in my life I do not feel like I am lacking, or as if a part of myself is missing. Through Christ I feel whole, I feel complete. He filled all of the voids that I once desperately tried to fill with earthly things and methods. Those are no longer needed as with Him I am whole and full of life. (Colossians 2:9-10) 

Instead of feeling as if I’m not worthy, I get to remember that I am now a child of God, that all of my past was forgiven and that that part of me was put to death and forgotten. That now with the wisdom of Christ within, I am worthy, and that as long as my heart and mind is set on Him, it’ll will all be OK. (Colossians 3:1-3)

With always struggling with feeling lost, never feeling as if I had any real purpose in my life, turning my life over to Christ and giving my life entirely to Him and knowing that there is a purpose for it brings about a joy and comfort I’ve never known. It makes it easy to stay away from the very things that no longer serve a purpose in my life. It makes you want to be a better person. It makes you want to strive to do better. It makes you hunger for the Word and to draw closer to Him. (Colossians 3:4-5)

I have always thought of myself as being kind, loving and compassionate, even though I’ve had a lifetime of people telling me otherwise when I wouldn’t accept their mistreatment of me. This one reaffirmed to me perhaps I wasn’t always as lost as I once thought I was as this was always my heart. It makes me believe that I was always one of God’s chosen ones. (Colossians 3:12)

I know that He is using me for greater things than I could ever imagine. I know that He has a purpose for my writing skills and I will wait patiently for that purpose to come to light. And in the meantime I will continue to learn, to grow in my faith and to expand my knowledge as He wants me too. So I will no longer doubt or allow the insecurities about my writing to get in the way or hold me back. I put my complete faith in Him and with the gifts He has given me. (1 Corinthians 1:5)

I am not “nothing” anymore. How could I be when I myself am God’s temple? Surely He would not dwell in someone that was nothing as others have long tried to convince me I was!? I am something far greater than that of those that have tried to break me. I have risen far above and will never again fall to where they once held me. (1 Corinthians 3:16)

I know now that the narrative that I long held as being the truth on my life was not written by myself, but by the opinions of those that were not of the moral compass equatable to my own. They should have never been given the pen or the chance to contribute to it, thus now I take that right away and reclaim my story as my own. I only have one Author I allow to write my story and one narrative I want to dictate the way others, including myself, perceive my life to be. (1 Corinthians 15:33-34)

I will not allow anyone to deter me from what God has placed within my heart. They can say whatever, try to make me feel however, and run my name through the dirt, that’s fine. I have a solid foundation to stand on thanks to Him and I have no plans on budging from the plans that He has set in motion. I am strong, I am smart, I am worthy, I am all of the things that people have tried to convince me over the years that I wasn’t, PLUS so much more. So much more! Just watch and see as I believe He truly does have big plans in store for me! (1 Corinthians 15:58)

So my question to you today is: have you allowed others or your past to alter the narrative of your life? If so, I urge you to find a new narrative, a kinder, more accurate and loving account that honors the truths of your life verses the lies we’ve allowed to consume us for far too long. Change your narrative within yourself so that you can change how you look at yourself and realize that all those burdens that you’ve been carrying attached to your story are just that, burdens that you need to let go and give to Him so that you can start living your best life. We have the power to say that this isn’t how we want our story to go and/or end, and to make the that change today! 

Billie is a 40-something stay-at-home momma of five beautiful children and Grammy to three grandchildren. When not wrangling the littles, she babysits for her two adult children. You will find her gardening, canning, baking, and making the most delicious meals for her family. Billie is a multitasker juggling a team of miniature tyrants, a cat, a snake, two dogs, two rats, and nine chickens. In her spare time, she enjoys reading and studying her bible. Her passion is sharing the gospel through her writing! So, whether she’s feeding your body with delicious meals or feeding your soul through her writing, join Billie as she takes you on a journey providing you with “Food for Thought.”

One of the most interesting people in the bible for me was (King) Solomon, outside of Jesus and the apostles, of course. He was the perfect example in my opinion of how we can humble ourselves and reap more than our hearts ever desire by doing so. How you can have the whole world (or so it would have seemed in those days) handed to you by the good Lord himself and still find yourself falling victim of being human at the end of the day. How wisdom and knowledge beyond all others meant nothing when influenced by the wrong crowd…

If you are anything like me, you tend to beat yourself up when you find yourself “stuck” in a spiritual rut, or when you have slipped up and sinned. Now I know that we all sin, but I mean when we do one of those things that just tend to eat us up inside because we truly knew better. I myself can’t even count the number of times over the years where I’d mess up and my first instinct was to run away from God verses running to Him the way He wants us too. I mean, why would He want me, the one who couldn’t do anything right for Him when He has done so much for me?

And if I’m to be honest, I don’t care to admit how many times I’ve asked myself, “Why are you so utterly stupid?”… But then, I remember King Solomon, and I start to feel a tad bit better about myself.

When you stop and think about how a man that purposely and intently asked for wisdom and knowledge over wealth from God (2 Chronicles 1.10) and was blessed with both and so much more all because he asked for it, was still able to make poor decisions? He still sinned and he still went against the very things God told him not to do. Kinda makes you feel better about your own pitfalls, doesn’t it?

“King Solomon was greater in riches and wisdom than all the other kings of the earth. All the kings of the earth sought audience with Solomon to hear the wisdom God had put in his heart.” (2 Chronicles 9.22)

Let that sink in… All knew that God is who put the wisdom within Solomon’s heart, and they sought him out to hear it. And in the end, he still fell victim to temptation, corruption, and being under the influence of others which all lead him to turning away from and forsaking the Lord and the Lord’s decrees and commands.

Imagine having the wisdom and knowledge bestowed upon you from God Himself, and still making mistakes. Imagine having that same insane amount of knowledge and wisdom to where all of the other kings on earth seek you out to hear it, and your silly self still succumbs to sin. Imagine having all of the world’s wealth, riches and blessings beyond belief and still not being satisfied, so you fall prey to being swayed into idolatry, polygamy, adultery, and all kinds of sinful behavior.

I mean, I guess, because in reality beneath all of those things he was nothing but a simple human. You know, like you and I?

Surely if the man who had been blessed directly by God Himself with knowledge and wisdom unsurpassed can mess up and sin, I can allow myself some grace when I do too, right? If God graced Solomon with all of those blessings knowing in the end how it was going to turn out, why do we run from Him and what He has given us when He already knows full well what is coming?

Why is it we are programmed to beat ourselves up for being human? Maybe we need to practice allowing ourselves room for error because the truth is there are none of us that are perfect. And even if we strive to be, the reality is that we are still going to sin, and we are still going to wish that we were able to do better. Yes, we should utilize those feelings to fuel us to do better, to be better, of course! But we really do need to practice being kinder to ourselves. We need to offer ourselves the same grace that we offer unto others. While we all strive to love and forgive one another, let’s not forget to love and forgive ourselves, too!

God never wants us to run from Him when we mess up! Just like any good Father, He wants to help us through whatever it is we are going through but we have to run to Him for that to happen. And just like any good parent, He gives us the tools and waits patiently while we learn to utilize them. Sometimes I believe we all forget that our strongest tool in the toolbox is His faithfulness to us.

“No temptation has overtaken you that is not common to man. God is faithful, and he will not let you be tempted beyond your ability, but with temptation he will also provide the way of escape, that you may be able to endure it.” 1 Corinthians 10.13

Billie is a 40-something stay-at-home momma of five beautiful children and Grammy to three grandchildren. When not wrangling the littles, she babysits for her two adult children. You will find her gardening, canning, baking, and making the most delicious meals for her family. Billie is a multitasker juggling a team of miniature tyrants, a cat, a snake, two dogs, two rats, and nine chickens. In her spare time, she enjoys reading and studying her bible. Her passion is sharing the gospel through her writing! So, whether she’s feeding your body with delicious meals or feeding your soul through her writing, join Billie as she takes you on a journey providing you with “Food for Thought.”

As Christians, you will oftentimes hear it be said that you need to be careful of the company that you keep. You are urged to keep like minded company, to stay within the Christian community, and to surround yourself with those that hold themselves to the same moral compass as you do. And just as often, many of us will balk at that idea and believe that we will be fine if we surround ourselves with those that don’t fall into those guidelines. 

So why is it so important for Christians, especially those new to faith, to be selective on whom they surround themselves with? Simply put, we are the company that we keep and we tend to be like sponges and we soak up the thoughts and belief systems of those that we are around the most. We can be absolutely sure that our hearts are in one place but quickly fall under the influence of someone else and their opinion, thus completely abandoning everything that we ourselves had held sacred. 

“Walk with the wise and become wise, for a companion of fools suffers harm.”

“Trouble pursues the sinner, but the righteous are rewarded with good things.”Proverbs 13.20-21 

Stop and think of how many times this very thing took place within the New Testament in the Bible. Poor Paul had his work cut out for him as there was always someone undermining him. It sure did seem like every time Paul turned his back someone was there negating all that they had accomplished. And just think, this was back when he and the other apostles were still performing miracles in Jesus’ name, and people still doubted him all because others came in and said that he was wrong. Even those that saw those miracles with their own eyes were easily swayed. Could you imagine his frustration?? 

But common sense aside, just by reading the Word we will discover passages that instruct us on exactly this issue. Here you have Paul giving a warning on this very matter that was found in 2 Corinthians 6.14-15 “Do not be yoked together with unbelievers. For what do righteousness and wickedness have in common? Or what fellowship can light have with darkness? What harmony is there between Christ and Belial? Or what does a believer have in common with an unbeliever?” 

Then in 6:16-18 it goes on to say, “… As God has said: “I will live with them and walk among them, and I will be their God, and they will be my people.” Therefore, “Come out from them and be separate, says the Lord. Touch no unclean thing and I will receive you.” And, “I will be a Father to you, and you will be my sons and daughters, says the Lord Almighty.”

Then Paul goes on to say in 7:1, “Therefore since we have these promises dear friends, let us purify ourselves from everything that contaminates body and spirit, perfecting holiness out of reverence for God.”

There has always been a reason behind being careful with who we mingle with and invite into our lives. If nothing else resonates within your mind, one would hope that at least the promises from God should drive you to take those warnings more seriously. Again, we need to be reminded that God knew full well that we’re human and that temptation was part of who we are. Keeping company with those that are likely to sway our thought processes falls under that category. It is indeed a temptation, especially if you’re going through a lonely phase in your life. But remember just as it states in 1 Corinthians 10.13 “God is faithful; he will not let you be tempted beyond what you can bear. But when you are tempted, he will also provide a way out so that you can endure it.”

Now I know that many of us have people in our lives, whether from our past or present, that we’re thinking to ourselves fall under this category, and we feel obligated to keep them in our life. Whether it is out of familial duty, the history between you, or maybe you feel like you owe it to them for whatever reason. But we have to remind ourselves that we were commanded by Him that we are to put Him above everyone and everything else. (see Matthew 10.37). 

We are to love Him above all else. And just as He further commanded of us, “Whoever does not take up their own cross and follow me is not worthy of me.” (10:38) He’s telling you right there in those two verses that you have to make the choice between Him, or those things that you’re coddling and holding onto. He’s telling you that you can’t follow him but yet hang onto the things in your life that will hold you back from devoting your whole self completely to him. He’s giving you simple instructions on how to do this the right way and yet so many of us still say we don’t know what we are doing wrong. 

Incidentally, we also need to avoid (or attempt to because sometimes they make it hard) those that purposely cause a division within our community. There seems to be an over abundance of those that are fueled by nothing short of hatred, spite and the purpose of dividing the masses as much as they possibly can. It still astounds me to see just how much of this takes place within the Christian community as well. They make it really easy to pick out who is seeking religion for the sake of saying they have it, verses a relationship with our Lord and Savior. 

These folks are just as toxic to us as those that I just wrote about. They will cause you to act out of character, to be someone that you are not, oftentimes provoking the side of you that you valiantly keep at bay. They will purposely and intentionally try to trigger you just to garner a response out of you or to prove themselves right, e.g., “Christians don’t act that way!” or “See, religion is bad because look at how you treated me!” 

But alas, warnings of these very things were contained throughout the Bible as well, but the ones in the book of Jude caught my attention here recently… 

(4.) “For certain individuals whose condemnation was written about long ago have secretly slipped in among you. They are ungodly people, who pervert the grace of our God into a license for immorality and deny Jesus Christ our only Sovereign and Lord.”

(10.) “Yet these people slander whatever they do not understand, and the very things they do understand by instinct- as irrational animals do- will destroy them.”

(16.) “These people are grumblers and faultfinders; they follow their own evil desires; they boast about themselves and flatter others for their own advantage.”

So what do you do if you’re caught being stuck in the middle of the believers verses non believers debacle? Especially in today’s times where we often feel that our voices are the ones less heard and respected. What do we Christians need to do in order to maintain our dignity, our moral stance and to uphold our values? Are we just supposed to just shy away and surrender under the opposition? Or rather are we to just succumb to the modern day bullying that we face day in and day out? What about all of the so called religious leaders that are making a mockery of the very thing we are trying so hard to salvage and advance? 

Simple, we should take the advice that was also found in Jude… 

1:17-23 “But dear friends, remember what the apostles of our Lord Jesus Christ foretold. They said to you, “In the last times there will be scoffers who will follow their own ungodly desires.” These are the people who divide you, who will follow mere natural instincts and do not have the Spirit. But you, dear friends, by building yourselves up in your most holy faith and praying in the Holy Spirit, keep yourselves in God’s love as you wait for the mercy of our Lord Jesus Christ to bring you to eternal life. Be merciful to those who doubt; save others by snatching them from the fire; to others show mercy, mixed with fear- hating even the clothing stained by corrupted flesh.” 

It is becoming more vital each day that those within the Christian community unite together and lift one another up as a whole. We should be supporting one another and helping one another grow. There should be love amongst us all, not division. Truly folks, right now is when we need to come together and grow our congregations and reach as many as we can. The day is coming where it won’t matter what denomination you lay claim too, it will only matter that you are a follower of Christ and that you have allowed Him fully within your heart. 

“Nations are in uproar, kingdoms fall; he lifts his voice, the earth melts.” Psalm 46.6

Billie is a 40-something stay-at-home momma of five beautiful children and Grammy to three grandchildren. When not wrangling the littles, she babysits for her two adult children. You will find her gardening, canning, baking, and making the most delicious meals for her family. Billie is a multitasker juggling a team of miniature tyrants, a cat, a snake, two dogs, two rats, and nine chickens. In her spare time, she enjoys reading and studying her bible. Her passion is sharing the gospel through her writing! So, whether she’s feeding your body with delicious meals or feeding your soul through her writing, join Billie as she takes you on a journey providing you with “Food for Thought.”

When Joram saw Jehu he asked, “Have you come in peace, Jehu?”

“How can there be peace,” Jehu replied, “as long as all the idolatry and witchcraft of your mother Jezebel abound?” 2 Kings 9:22

When it was put in my heart to seek out what message I was to write about from Kings, I wasn’t given much to go on. I thought to myself, “Oh boy, this is going to be like a needle in a haystack!” Then I came across it and even though relief flooded through me, it was short lived as it dawned on me that I really am not well versed in the Old Testament books, especially when it pertains to the kings and if we’re going to be honest, trying to follow lineage and whatnot can be intimidating.

Most of us have some knowledge on Jezebel, the chaos she caused and how she plagued (and how the Jezebel spirit continues on with her cause) her time with nothing but wickedness. There are endless articles, books and research completed upon exactly that. So why Lord do you want me to focus on this passage?

Then the words cleared up in my mind and it became clear to me what I was meant to write…

“How can there be peace, as long as all the idolatry and witchcraft of your mother Jezebel abound?”

How many of us were raised in homes or by families that participated in behaviors that we now know are not ok by Biblical standards, and because of this we still find ourselves struggling to absolve ourselves of those behaviors?

We also find ourselves struggling to “unlearn” those behaviors simply, because, for so long we were led to believe that they were acceptable and/or ‘not that bad’.

We grew up being exposed to things like horoscopes, drinking, drugs, partying, gambling, adultery and premarital sex (just to name a few). Come on now, we all know so many of us saw our moms or aunties checking their horoscopes faithfully, or maybe it was the cool neighbor who always boasted how she was heading to the casino to win big every weekend.

Or how at every family cook out we had the uncles that we never saw without a beer in their hands? Or the family members that seemed to have a rotating door of new “happily ever after’s” that moved in and out more often than most of us change the light bulbs in our homes.

As children, being exposed to and being raised around those things quickly became “normal” to us. We became conditioned to believe that these things were acceptable and that it wasn’t any of our business to say otherwise. What was the saying, “As long as it isn’t hurting anyone else it isn’t any of your business?”

Truly I tell you, behaviors being learned by little eyes really is all of our business when you stop and think about it. And to think now, today, what our own children are being exposed to daily, wowzers! Truly it is no wonder our world is full of so many lost souls walking around hurt and hurting others. Unfortunately, the spirit and motives of Jezebel are still abound, and plentiful. And it is more important now than ever before that we set the example for our own children to follow, which in part will lead to theirs following suit, and so forth.

None of us are free from sin, nor are we ever going to be. However, I do believe that we can strive to live in such a way that when our children look upon us they will see the glory and the goodness that being a God-lead Christian amounts to. And that they too will strive for such a way of life. That my friends, as parents, should be our end goal in parenting: to know that we raised them in such a way that they don’t have parts that need healed, that need reprogrammed or that need unlearned.

We truly need to open our eyes to just how impressionable they are, and to realize that they are our future and so much is riding on the seeds that we sow within them now.

While I don’t believe we will ever be able to fully rid the world of the “Jezebels”, we sure can sow more Ruth’s, Esther’s, Mary’s and Deborah’s. And in doing so, it’s those seeds that will go on to produce more peace throughout the world.

“Sow with a view to righteousness, Reap in accordance with kindness; Break up your fallow ground, For it is time to seek the Lord until He comes to rain righteousness on you.” Hosea 10.12 NASB

Billie is a 40-something stay-at-home momma of five beautiful children and Grammy to three grandchildren. When not wrangling the littles, she babysits for her two adult children. You will find her gardening, canning, baking, and making the most delicious meals for her family. Billie is a multitasker juggling a team of miniature tyrants, a cat, a snake, two dogs, two rats, and nine chickens. In her spare time, she enjoys reading and studying her bible. Her passion is sharing the gospel through her writing! So, whether she’s feeding your body with delicious meals or feeding your soul through her writing, join Billie as she takes you on a journey providing you with “Food for Thought.”

I was sitting here this morning thinking about Mother’s Day and I was flooded with thoughts of Mary. Do you ever stop and wonder what life was like for her being the mother of the Messiah? Good grief, and we think we have it hard…

Imagine being a woman and being “told” that your whole world was about to be abruptly turned upside down. And there was absolutely nothing you could do to change the course of it. Surely no amount of whining, opposing, or screaming about your rights was going to alter the course that was set in place for you and that beautiful baby you were now graced with carrying. You and your soon to be husband were in for a life of “what ifs” and you had only your faith to carry you through each step of the way. 

Each time that you find yourself faced with a hard time in your life pertaining to your children, stop and put yourself in Mary’s shoes. My word, I can’t even imagine the strength she had to have within knowing the insurmountable outcome that lay ahead for her child. Now one could argue, “Billie, she didn’t know what was to come for her child, so how can you say that?” My answer is simple, she was his mother, trust me she knew.

I think any of us that are mothers can understand that statement, more so when we stop and we think of how she was chosen out of all of the other women in the world at that time. There was a reason that God chose her and it would be unreasonable to discount the importance of that. I would imagine that the bond she held with Jesus was incomparable to anything we know today. God gave her the purpose of being his mother for a reason, and I’m certain that with that came a depth of knowledge and knowing that we can’t even fathom. So yes, I truly believe she knew deep down inside from the very beginning what kind of future lay ahead for her child. 

Fast forward to when it became time for Jesus to start his journey in making himself known. Good grief I can only imagine the complexity of emotions that riddled Mary’s mind and heart. I would believe it is a safe bet to say she was filled with an unsurpassed pride for what her son was about to embark upon. Can you imagine knowing that your child was chosen for such an important role for humanity? That God Himself had chosen him for such a purpose and now you get to watch him walk in that purpose. I can only imagine how her heart swelled with the pride she held for him as she watched him progress along his journey and to watch him blossom fully into the purpose of what God had in store for him. 

But sitting here as a mother, my heart breaks for Mary, as I can only imagine the fear and torment that plagued her also. I know that she was of great faith and that it was her faith that kept her strong, but as a mother I also know that she had to have been afraid for her child. She was, after all, human. Even knowing he was to serve a purpose for the greater good and for God Himself, she was his Mama and there was no way she didn’t fear or mourn for her child. 

And for her to have such a strong faith in Him and in God to believe in that purpose and to faithfully follow him without hindrance, she truly exhibited a strength that I believe many of us today would do a service to ourselves to dig deep and find within ourselves. Sometimes I believe we need to remind ourselves that we need to let go and trust in the good Lord and to trust our child, for God has a plan for them and who are we to hinder that? Who are we to attempt to alter the design that God has set forth for our child and the path He set out for our child long before we even thought of bringing our child into this world? 

Mary was the perfect example of being the strong, faith driven mother. She knew that God’s plans were what she needed to nurture and allow to take root within her child, and she never attempted to hinder that. She nurtured it, she promoted it, she kept faithful even knowing that it most likely was going to bring turmoil and/or trouble upon her son. But it was her faith and her hope in God that led her in her ways while raising who would become our Savior. 

“… My soul glorifies the Lord and my spirit rejoices in God my Savior, for he has been mindful of the humble state of his servant. From now on all generations will call me blessed, for the Mighty One has done great things for me holy is his name.” Luke 1.46-49 

This weekend as we celebrated the mothers in our lives let us not forget to stop and remember the one that we really should pay homage too. And let us reflect and ponder upon the kind of mother she was, her devotion not only to her child but that she had to God, too. And let us (honestly) ask ourselves where we may have room for improvement in both areas so that one day we can look back and say, “I was blessed, for the Mighty One has done great things for me…”

Billie is a 40-something stay-at-home momma of five beautiful children and Grammy to three grandchildren. When not wrangling the littles, she babysits for her two adult children. You will find her gardening, canning, baking, and making the most delicious meals for her family. Billie is a multitasker juggling a team of miniature tyrants, a cat, a snake, two dogs, two rats, and nine chickens. In her spare time, she enjoys reading and studying her bible. Her passion is sharing the gospel through her writing! So, whether she’s feeding your body with delicious meals or feeding your soul through her writing, join Billie as she takes you on a journey providing you with “Food for Thought.”